An Interview With Janet

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An Interview with Janet

By BA

It was tacitly understood that, having made it through to the final interview for a position with First International, I would be accepting any offer they decided to make me. Still, theoretically the choice was still mine and my interviewer seemed happy to play the game by offering to show me the many inducements to accept.

After the formal board interview, which I thought had gone well, Janet had taken me away to IT for the extensive battery of employee testing I had been warned to expect. As an android it is quite usual for prospective employers to make sure that my systems can perform to their requirements before making their final decision and I had made sure to be fully serviced and to minimise my runtime in preparation.

Janet McCloud headed the department I was applying for. She was every inch the smart executive that I aspired to be and took pains to make sure I well looked after and all my questions were answered, waiting and chatting with me while the IT techs did their business. Obviously quite familiar with modern androids she was not at all bothered when, stripped to my bra and plugged-in in the busy open plan department, I experienced a slight glitch and climaxed quite loudly. The analysis software being run through me was comprehensive and I guess I was pretty hyped to be there. Fortunately my service protocols were properly engaged and I was not at all embarrassed, after all sex is a high priority for my design.

While my systems were being checked out I asked about the company service facilities, a major incentive for me was the opportunity to be fully maintained ‘in house’ and Janet took me for a look around one the tests were finished. As I’d expected preliminary analysis of the results indicated I would me well above the required capabilities, after all I am a very modern unit!

I was blown away by the building’s service floor. It was staffed with several expensive human-form robots; not reprogrammed utility units but purpose built technical models and had seven state of the art maintenance bays along with at least a dozen daily service booths for recharging and programming. There were some units ‘in the shop’ as we looked around, one undergoing extensive internal procedures, still online and hooked up for monitoring but understandably glitching considerably, and several standing in their default poses in booths offline and connected to the facilities support mainframe and power.

Janet smiled at my obvious enthusiasm. “I’m glad you’re impressed, Louise. Feel free to watch the maintenance for as long as you like but, if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll take the opportunity to update while I’m here…” She moved towards the spare technicians standing silently by the wall.

“Oh…”, I was taken aback for a moment, not having realised that the glamorous executive was another android. I don’t know why I should be surprised, after all I am flawlessly realistic when fully assembled myself!” “Of course Janet, it’s important to keep up to date; I’d be interested to see the procedure if I may?”

“Sure, of course! I can show you the gym and social areas afterwards.” Janet selected a waiflike technician with dark spiky hair and a very pretty face gazing blankly at the floor across the room. She reached deftly behind her ear to turn her on then crossed to a free service booth. The tech, ‘207’ by her badge, lifted her head without expression and stared directly ahead while she ran silently through her start-up procedures.

“Are the techs employees too?” I asked.

Janet had stepped backwards into the waist high curve of the booth, little more than a safety rail to prevent inert units from being knocked over, and pulled a cable towards her from the complex control station beside it. “Oh no, they’re purely functional AIs; company property. They don’t leave the lab unless there’s a malfunction somewhere in the building but that almost never happens…”

She frowned in concentration for a second and a perfectly hidden patch of tanned flesh on her chest sank smoothly inwards then slid up to reveal a power / data interface underneath. I was not familiar with Janet’s model but the accessibility of her ports for normal office use, nestling in the ‘vee’ of her blouse, made a lot of sense. My own systems are a bit more personal to get at! Janet plugged the data cable into one of her ports causing a few LEDs to flicker quickly then stood patiently smoothing her clothes and hair while she waited for the little tech to become fully available.

“Most employee units are free to hot-connect to power and data throughout the building, either by hard connection like you did earlier or by Wi-Fi, but the protocol on the service floor requires a technician to initialise all connections. It’s just a precaution; a full-powered malfunction in here could be very expensive! Not even I am programmed to be able to use the equipment in here… ‘207’ - over here please!”

The tech had announced herself online then stepped forward, looking for a task. She smiled and crossed to Janet, nodding nicely to me as she passed, and they discussed the procedure briefly. This was completely routine for both of them; the executive unit had received an email notifying her of the need to install a new batch of software updates at the next convenient time. “I’ll stay online for this one as I have a visitor,” Janet said, smiling at me.

“No problem Mrs McCloud”, ‘207’ nodded and tapped a few controls on the booth console to initialise the data link and I watched with interest as Janet straightened up suddenly to stand rigidly in the booth. Her face blanked out for a moment before coming back to life. It seemed that the facility’s precautions extended to isolating units’ motor functions even for a simple update; I usually install mine on umbilical at home but I could see why, with so many androids being worked on in one place, more stringent controls made sense here. Janet’s default standing pose showed off her figure well; with her back perfectly straight and her chest thrust forward. Her arms were straight down, with only a slight bend in the elbows and fingers, and held out a few inches from her sides making the stance look rather unnatural but, no doubt, allowing better access to her torso when required.

As usual for an advanced full AI android, the attractive machine’s motor isolation did not extend to tertiary functions such as face and speech so Janet could continue to talk to her tech after isolation, turning her head slightly awkwardly with her shoulders immobilised. Simply talking is by far the easiest, though not necessarily the most efficient, way to communicate with an android during maintenance operations, so this is the way most of us are programmed. ‘207’ and Janet identified the required update files in the system and Janet reviewed their contents.

I had begun to loose interest in this very straightforward procedure. Other than the slightly overcautious isolation of Janet’s motor systems this was no different from the frequent updates and reprogramming all androids experienced, myself included. My eyes had drifted back across the room but after a while I realised that Janet and her tech were still discussing update protocols. Janet had not surrendered her AI port access to the mainframe… Was there some problem?

“The commercial data pack – fine, the OS patch – fine, no problems with the fix for the dermal response driver, but… this selfware upgrade is tagged for a T07 personality type. I’m a T09, wouldn’t it be better to wait for the appropriate release? It’s not a critical fix…”

“Oh? Let me bring your specs up… Yes, you are definitely running a T09 base AI program. This upgrade is designed to improve your attitude to leisure and recreation; so not critical at all. It is perfectly compatible with any T-series selfware though so I think we might as well install it while you’re here.” ‘207’ browsed through Janet’s detailed program specifications at the control station while the android, standing stiffly next to her, peered over her shoulder.

“I’d rather not compromise my designated AI type if possible; if all of our employee units were routinely cross-upgraded in this way then we’d all end up with the same personality!” Janet seemed good-humoured about the confusion and the slight delay before she was back in operation.

“Of course, I understand your concern but this is a very minor upgrade, your friends and colleagues will hardly notice the difference.” ‘207’ moved around in front of Janet and began to unfasten the motionless robot woman’s blouse while they debated the issue. I leaned forward, eager for a better view of her hard, tanned but womanly body.

“I would like you to deselect the AI upgrade before installation, at least until a T09 version is released, please.” Janet was polite but firm.

“Well, y…” The tech made to reply but the word froze on her lips and her head cocked for a second as she referred the situation wirelessly to the facility’s controller. She recovered almost instantly but made no effort to finish her sentence as she delicately spread Janet’s blouse apart.

Seeing me watching, Janet called across, “The facility is superb but like anywhere you always have to keep an eye on what they’re putting into you!” She winked.

Looking past the tech I was surprised to see that the senior android was not nearly as lifelike as I expected. Although beautifully shaped, her skin texture was somewhat smooth over her not normally visible areas. ‘207’ opened one of several quite clearly outlined panels in Janet’s plastic skin; she had to gently push the older woman’s lacy black B-cup bra slightly out of the way in order to hinge the cover out and down. Inside what was apparently Janet’s CPU access were the usual ports and LED indicators, which gently flickered seemingly at random. There were also basic android controls similar to the ones on my personal remote.

Janet was of course completely unfazed by being exposed and opened in this way. She was after all a machine in a repair shop so why should she be concerned just because she was also the customer? She was about to say something else when ‘207’ tapped the control to put her into safe mode so the executive unit simply looked straight ahead with a calm expression instead; waiting for instructions which she would obey instantly and without question.

“Janet 664, please surrender access to your AI port and prepare to download updates.”

“Yes, Technician 207. AI port open.”

‘207’ tapped at the console again and Janet’s LEDs flurried in response. I was impressed at how efficiently Janet’s minor compliance aberration had been resolved thanks to the combination of strict servicing protocols and on site technical support. After all, the service mainframe was far better equipped to determine her requirements than the internal selfware AI she was running. The file transfer took a few seconds then Janet automatically announced, “Download complete: ComDat 2079.3, OSfix 17.8.1, DermSysDvr 3.3.2 T07AI-mod 27.4 ready for installation.”

“Janet 664, please install your updates.”

“Yes, Technician 207. Installing ComDat 2079.3… Installation complete. Installing OSfix 17.8.1… Installation complete. Installing DermSysDvr 3.3.2… Installation complete. Installing T07AI-mod 27.4… Installation complete. All updates successfully installed. Please restart to initialise new programming.”

“Janet 664, please restart into operational mode.” ‘207’ unplugged the data cable and stowed it away above the console then closed Janet’s port cover over the blinking LEDs.

“Yes Technician 207. Restarting into operational mode. Janet 664 shutting down.” The executive paused for a moment as her AI and supporting software closed then her head tilted forward a fraction and she waited vacant-faced for ten seconds before she straightened up. “Janet 664 initialised… System check complete: no errors. Hardware check complete: no failures, power at 64 percent. Initialising Mrs Janet McCloud AI protocols. Hello I’m Janet.”

“Your updates have been successfully installed Mrs McCloud, do you require anything else?”

“No thank you ‘207’”, Janet turned my way buttoning up her blouse without comment, “unless you need anything Louise?”

“Not right now thank you, I was only serviced yesterday, but I’m certainly looking forward to using this place if I get the job!”

“Oh, between you and me I think we can safely say it will be yours. You are streets ahead of the other units applying!” I couldn’t hid my broad grin as my soon to be boss tucked herself in and straightened her clothes. “’207’ you can shut down now. Well Louise, shall we take a tour of the recreation floors?”

“I’d love to, Janet!”


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