Spaz Studios Presents: “Fizzy Pop”
Is there something missing in your drink? Perhaps some flavor?
Well, fret no more! Fizzy Pop is the best thing since sliced bread!
Our scientists have discovered a way to brew a soda that generates a mild electric shock to your taste buds, thus stimulating them to enhance the flavor.
Head on over to the nearest vending machine or participating store today and grab your Fizzy Pop before it sells out!
“The Break Room”
George had been planning it for days, ever since seeing the news reports. He was interested in this hot girl that worked upstairs in the electronics department at the store he worked at, but she did not seem to share the same interest. Sure, she was friendly when they talked, but that was about it.
When he heard rumors that she was an android, he thought he had to try and take advantage of her…who knows, maybe she was programmed to ignore his advances and the plan would fix it.
Anyway, the time had finally come. He knew she was in the break room, and that no one else would be in there for a while due to an event occurring on the first floor, so he made his move.
“Hey Jennifer, how’s your day been going?” he asked, walking casually into the break room and opening the refrigerator to grab his drink.
“Fine George, a little slow because of the festivities, but it’s allowed me to catch up on things,” she smiled.
Jennifer was very attractive. She was fairly short and somewhat stout, and in her mid-twenties with long brown hair tied into a ponytail. Her brown eyes looked quite nice with her usual expression, which 95% of the time was a smile. Seriously, she probably smiled even when she was upset.
“I see,” he said, opening his drink and taking a sip. “Damn this stuff is good,” he thought to himself, almost taking a larger sip before stopping himself. “Shit, you were supposed to say that out loud,” he thought again.
“Damn, this stuff is good,” he said, sounding perhaps a little rehearsed, though Jennifer did not appear to notice.
“What is it?” she asked.
“It’s this new drink out called Fizzy Pop,” he explained, growing excited that his plan was slowly going well, “I don’t know how they do it, but they really get the flavors to pop,” he said. “Here, do you want to try?” he asked.
“Sure,” she said after giving it some thought.
After she took a sip, she took a second larger sip and said, “Wow, this stuff tastes awesome!”.
“Glad you think so,” George smiled, watching her intently.
At first, he was worried that maybe she wasn’t an android after all, but suddenly a few seconds later, her head jerked.
“Goodness,” she said, “I don’t know what happened” she said, looking normal, aside from the fact that her left eye was twitching.
“Are you alright?” he asked her, hoping to coax a stronger malfunction.
“Sure…I mean, no, I mean yes, I….m.eeeeeeeeee.an,” she said, her voice sounding digitally distorted, her face cycling through dozens of expressions.
“And here goes nothing,” George said, seizing his opportunity and pressing the override switch on the back of her neck, shutting her off.
“Systems shutting dowwwwwwwnnnnn,” she said, her voice winding down and her body slumping into his arms.
“Wow, didn’t realize how heavy you were,” he grunted, just barely keeping her from falling. “Better get you out of sight,” he said, and he carefully dragged her out of the break room and into a nearby stockroom where he knew he would not be disturbed, especially since he had already clocked out for the day.
Once he had her in a more secluded location, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and connected it wirelessly to Jennifer’s now unprotected systems. Following the instructions he read online, he managed to reprogram her to believe she was his girlfriend and to be okay with it.
While he was waiting for the changes to take effect, he decided to do some simple exploring of her body, starting with her hands. Her hands were so real, even with their own set of fingerprints and a mild odor of perspiration and the smell of some sort of cleaner.
After finishing with her hands, he decided to remove her shoes. The slip-ons she was wearing were a simple black, since the place they worked at only allowed them to wear boring colors. When she removed her right shoe, he was delighted to see that she was not wearing one of those small socks beneath it, so he got his first look at her small, yet pretty feet.
“Wow, whoever built you knew what they were doing,” George mused, having removed the other shoe and marveling at the perfection of her feet. “They even have an odor,” he said, sniffing them approvingly. He was also pleased to see she had healthy looking nails that were well trimmed and unpainted.
His exploration was cut short when his phone beeped signaling that the reprogramming was complete. Satisfied, he pressed her override switch again, turning her back on.
“Systems booting…” she said, and then she came online.
“Whoa, how did I get back here?” she asked, getting up and looking around.
“Oh, I took you back here because you were malfunctioning from that drink,” George told her.
“Oh, thanks for that sweetie, I wouldn’t want everyone here knowing I’m an android,” she smiled.
Yes, it worked! George thought to himself.
“So, you want to do anything with me now that you’ve got me alone back here?” she asked coquettishly.
“I thought you’d never ask,” George said, taking his shirt off.
“And I see you already got a head start on me,” she smiled, noticing for the first time that she was barefoot.
“Well, you know I like your feet, and it took a while for you to come back online,” he said, now unlacing his shoes and then removing his socks.
“I see, don’t be so hasty next time,” she chided, “I might not be in the mood so soon after a malfunction,” she said, removing her worn out blue polo shirt and slipping her slacks down to her ankles, now standing before him in nothing but her underwear.
“How long before you have to go back onto the salesfloor?” George asked, taking off the rest of his clothes.
“Not for another 25-minutes…plenty of time,” she smiled, now completely nude.
George took a moment to remind himself that he was not dreaming…that the girl he had been asking out for weeks was actually a robot who now thought she was his girlfriend and was completely naked. She looked more beautiful than he had ever imagined.
“Done staring?” she laughed.
“Oh yes, sorry,” George blushed.
“Alright then, hurry up and get inside me before someone comes,” she said.
“Alright,” George said, and he quickly inserted himself into her welcoming womanhood and began working her.
Everything was going just fine at first, with both of them approaching climax, when suddenly she started twitching and glitching out.
“Critical error in fluidic storage systems,” she blurted out, still going through the motions with him.
“Jennifer, are you going to make it?” he asked, seeing smoke coming from her mouth.
“I thiii.iii.iii.iii.iiinn.nn.nnnnnnk soo.oooo.oooo,” she said, her voice in a clipped digitized tone.
“Alright, I’m coming,” he shouted, and just as he came, so did she, though her climax included her head blowing straight off her neck and landing a few feet away.
After the waves of ecstasy passed, he blinked and looked at the headless body he was still inserted in. It was still moving around a little, and smoke was rising from the neck.
“Wow, that was the best I’ve ever had,” he said, carefully removing himself and cleaning himself off with a nearby piece of clothing.
“Wow, that was the best I’ve ever had,” Jennifer’s voice sounded from her head, lying a few feet away, seeming to echo and mock his statement.
“Are you alright Jennifer?” George asked, walking over and picking her head up. Her head seemed to have suffered no apparent damage, but her face was twitching.
“Best I’ve ever had…ever had…ever had,” she said, stuck in a loop caused by the obvious damage.
After shutting her head off with the override switch, he looked at his watch. “Well Jennifer, looks like I have 15-minutes to fix you,” he said, “figures, even powered off you still have that smile on your face,” he laughed.
As he began repairing the damage, based on the reports from online, he whistled the jingle for Fizzy Pop.
This just in, there has been an important product notification.
The makers of Fizzy Pop, the latest drink sensation to sweep the nation, are warning the public about a potential danger regarding their product. This shocking confection, which delivers a minor shock to the tongue of humans, thus enhancing the flavor of the beverage, has been reported to have devastating effects when consumed by the android population*.
Reports of damage range from minor malfunctions to catastrophic systems failures resulting in total destruction of the android, and even the corruption of its data cores. While most cases are accidental, some people are taking advantage of the situation to trick android friends, loved ones, and co-workers into consuming the beverage in order to take advantage of them.
We implore you to program your androids with the latest blacklist patch, or program them to avoid the drink at any cost…
- (Only affects android models capable of imbibing)
“I can see this is going to be a long day” Bill sighed to himself as he pulled into the parking lot of the local mall.
He normally was called to people’s home’s to fix their various androids, mostly outdated sexbots that simply needed to be upgraded or replaced, but his reputation had grown in recent years that now he received calls from businesses and even the police to come and fix broken down units in public places.
“This place looks nice, why were we called here?” a slightly annoying female voice called out to him from the back of his van.
“We’ve got a job Trixie, that’s what happens when we are as good at fixing things as we are,” he said, both sighing and smiling at the same time; Trixie had that effect on him.
Trixie used to be a sexbot, but when her previous owner figured he would be better off buying a newer unit that spending tons of money every month to keep fixing her, he ended up selling her to Bill, who refurbished her and turned her into a partner in his business.
She had the appearance of a busty college age girl, the typical choice of someone purchasing a sexbot. While she originally had blonde hair and blue eyes, Bill had changed her to a brunette and gave her green eyes. As much as it pained him, he also lowered her breast size from a 40D to a more manageable 34C, so that she could have an easier time doing her new job.
Unfortunately, he was still having a hard time changing her personality…
“Oh, some bozos wife break down again?” she asked,.
“Probably, though not for the usual reasons, or so I’ve heard,” he laughed, since the usual reasons usually involved another guy hacking her to have sex with them.
“Good, I hate fixing the damage caused by all the perverts in this world,” she said, grabbing her tool kit from the van and following him to the doors where mall security, the police, and several other officials were waiting.
“Me too,” he said.
“Are you Bill?” an important looking person asked.
“Yep, and this is my partner Trixie,” he said, though she was content just to smile rather than waste processing power on some lame comment.
“Okay,” he said, making a face at Trixie before turning back to Bill, “We had a small problem in the food court about an hour ago,” he began, “A woman, who turns out to be a registered android, had a catastrophic malfunction after consuming a rather well-known beverage,” he said, looking a bit uncomfortable.
“Fizzy Pop?” Bill guessed.
“Correct,” the man said, “Now of course she happened to purchase the beverage from one of our vending machines, rather than from one of the establishments, so if she is unable to be fixed, our asses are on the line,” he said.
“I see, though you could easily sue the makers of the beverage for any damages as well,” Bill said.
“Yeah, this isn’t our first Fizzy Pop disaster,” Trixie laughed.
“I see, well if you will follow me, I’ll take you to her,” he said, and he turned and headed into the building.
“So, does this woman have a husband or owner who knows of this incident?” Bill asked.
“Of course, he is out of town and is currently making plans to return as soon as possible,” the manager said, “I have assured him, though, that we will have his wife fixed before he gets here,”
“Well, we’ll see,” Bill said, “Some of these cases have been pretty mild, but it depends on how much she consumed and on what model she is,”
“I see, well I do hope you won’t make a liar of me,” the manager said.
“Well, you obviously read my ad on the internet, so you know my reputation…I will get her fixed,” Bill said.
“Good, we moved her to the nearby family rest room and closed the area off so you can have some privacy,” the manager said, walking them to a hallway off the food court.
“Thanks,” Bill said, and he walked into the room and looked at his latest ‘patient’.
The woman appeared to be in her mid to late thirties. She was one of the ultra-realistic models, so real that they are virtually indistinguishable from a human when standing side by side; her husband/owner had also gone the extra mile and added a few imperfections to her skin, a mole her, a freckle there. Overall, she was a splendid model.
Despite her beauty, the malfunction did a number on her dress when the electricity arced out of her body and charred her skin and dress. Also, she had an unusual expression fixed on her face.
“Wow, she’s nice,” Trixie said, putting her kit down and opening it up. After digging around in it, she pulled out a tablet which she activated and scanned over the woman’s frozen body.
“Can you access her emergency systems?” Bill asked.
“Yes, it’s telling me her main CPU and A.I. systems were protected,” she reported.
“Good, that means it’s only a mechanical issue,” Bill sighed.
“Does that mean you will have her fixed quickly?” the manager asked.
“Most likely, it depends on the extent of the internal damage…the important thing is, even if her body is totaled, her mind is completely intact and can easily be transferred to a new body, and that is enough that most owners probably won’t be as mad,” Bill explained.
“Alright, I’ll leave you alone then,” he said with a relieved look on his face, and then he headed out.
“Sheesh, that man was weird,” Trixie said as soon as he was gone.
“Maybe a little, but he just doesn’t want to get sued,” Bill said, removing the woman’s shirt and using a small brush-like device to manually unseal her abdominal release. As the brush slid over her perfect skin, the nanites keeping the panel sealed let go of one another and a seam about 6 inches by 8 inches around her navel. Once the panel was visible, he pressed into her navel and then lifted the fleshy panel off, revealing an amazing array of fibre optics, tubes, and the parts that comprised her skeletal structure.
“Wow, I never get over seeing that,” Trixie gasped.
“Neither do I,” Bill agreed, setting the flesh panel down and carefully probing around inside.
After probing inside her body for nearly five minutes, he gave a triumphant grunt and pulled out a damaged device.
“Did you find it?” Trixie asked.
“Yes, whoever had her built knew what he was doing…the damage was limited only to her fluidic transfer system…an easy fix,” he said, “The malfunction was merely to shut her off to prevent further damage,” he said.
“That’s cool, why don’t I have any of these fancy upgrades?” Trixie asked, looking at hum accusingly.
“Because I don’t make enough money and because I programmed you with more common sense than most of these other androids have,” he said, disconnecting the device and taking a look at the part number. “Good, I have this model…Trixie, go get the FTS model V from the van,” he said.
“Right away,” she saluted, causing him to smile.
“One of these days,” he muttered to himself as he worked on repairing the lesser damage to the fembot, “I’ll upgrade that girl so she can be my girlfriend too,” he said, and he continued repairing the fembot while Trixie retrieved the part he needed, opening a bottle of Fizzy Pop and taking a swig.
“Thanks Fizzy Pop, for all the extra business,” he said, “And for being a damn fine drink,” he added.
“Public service announcement”
“Hello, my name is Ulysses Flaherty, the creator of Fizzy Pop.”
“It has come to my attention that my product has been causing all sorts of mayhem in the android population,” he said, looking embarrassed, “And for that I am truly sorry,”
“I am currently working with the various android manufacturers in reimbursing affected parties, as well as to come up with a permanent solution so the android population can properly enjoy my product,”
“For now, I am urging all confirmed models to be affected to avoid my beverage until a fix is made,”
This scene takes place in what can only be described as a morgue for androids. There are many compartments where damaged/destroyed androids are kept for forensic analysis. The medical examiner is currently dictating a report on a unit with heavy damaged.
“Body appears to be a Class VII domestic unit, most likely real enough to pass as a spouse…ID appears intact, sending it up to the techs for them to analyze,” the doctor said, perusing the damaged android’s body.
As he continued to dictate his report, he put on a pair of latex gloves and dug into the massive cavity in the fembot’s torso caused by whatever destroyed her.
The fembot was fairly attractive considering she was designed with the appearance of a Caucasian woman in her early forties. Her face was free of imperfections and framed by long dark brown hair, and her hands and feet were very well kept with perfect nails and no apparent signs of artificial skin fatigue that would normally accompany a unit with this age; 10 years active.
“Damage appears extensive, most likely caused from some massive internal event,” he continued, his hands delving through bundles of fiber optics until he could get at her major ‘organs’.
“Ah, here’s the culprit,” he announced, disconnecting it from the multitude of wires and yanking it free of the body. “The fluidic storage unit appears to have been ruptured by some sort of electrical event,” he said, noting the outward facing damage, and the char marks both inside and out caused by electrical arks rupturing the tank.
“This is the same damage I’ve seen before, ten other units have come in with similar damage,” he said, glancing at several of the compartments behind him before refocusing on the damaged wife unit.
“This is most likely caused by the unit consuming Fizzy Pop, a beverage that causes a small ‘shock’ in the mouth of humans, but apparently has more devastating effects in the android population,” he noted.
After noting the official cause of the destruction, he muted the recorder and then said to himself, “Damn this is a fine unit, maybe if the owner doesn’t come forward, I’ll fix her up a little and have my way with her,” he said, gently caressing her realistic skin. This model was clearly more than he could ever hope to afford.
Suddenly, a middle aged man burst in, but with lightning fast reflexes, the examiner made it look as though he were merely examining the damage.
“Is this her, is that my wife!?” he demanded.
“Calm down sir, can I have your name?” the doctor asked, muttering an expletive under his breath.
“My name is Hal Stevens, I got a call that my wife Sue Stevens was having problems at the mall, but by the time I got there, the police told me she had already been taken here,” he said, seeming to calm down a little.
“Well, I haven’t identified her yet, but can you tell if it is her?” he asked, turning the face to face the flustered man.
“Oh God, yes…that’s her,” he sobbed. “What happened?”
“She appears to have sustained systematic damage after consuming the drink Fizzy Pop, I’m sorry,” the doctor said, muttering “Damn it!” under his breath.
“Is there anything you can do for her?” Hal asked.
“I’m sorry sir, that’s not what I do…the damage to her systems is quite extensive, the electrical event most likely damaged every system in her body, including her memory centers…even if a technician could recover some of it, there just isn’t enough left for her to be the same…person that you knew,” the doctor said.
“What?! What am I going to tell our kids?” Hal said, losing his composure and weeping uncontrollably.
“DAMN YOU FIZZY POP!....DAMN YOU!!!!!!”
As the man lost it on the floor, the examiner was wondering what the best way to ask the man for the body of his deceased wife…
“Alright sir, I think we’ve got it this time,” a lab tech in a lab coat said as he pulled away from the open head of a beautiful fembot.
“I hope so,” Ulysses said, crossing his fingers as the tech closed the head up and activated the fembot.
“Hello sir, how can I help you today?” she asked in a subservient tone.
“Here, have a drink,” he said, handing her a bottle of Fizzy Pop.
“Oooh, thanks,” she smiled, taking a drink. “Wow, the flavor really pops!” she said, taking another drink.
“How do you feel?” he asked, hoping this time it had worked.
“Fine…I think,” she said, making a funny face before suddenly her stomach blew open.
“Shit!” Ulysses yelled, picking the damaged fembot up and placing it in the bin with the other 20 failed units.